One common thing I find with the young people I work with is that they often say "I know I shouldn't do ………….." and I am trying to stop it.
The ………… ranges from stimming, overthinking, interrupting during conversations or lectures, and various other things. These actions all have one thing in common: they are common autistic and/or ADHD traits. They are also things that it is unlikely that a neurotypical young person would be criticised for.
When I talk to them further, most of them don't have an issue with what they do, but they have been told by so many others that it is wrong, annoying, or inappropriate.
I can remember being told off at school for tapping my pen. I felt belittled and humiliated because tapping my pen helped me follow the story of Anne of Green Gables. Small comments like that last a lifetime. While I can't remember the exact date, I know it was a Thursday during the lesson before lunch in 1987, which is a testament to the comment's impact on me.
As long as it isn't causing injury or harm to another person, the biggest and most helpful thing that can be done for an autistic person is acceptance and not highlighting differences.
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